I think partially the reason I feel the way if I’m being honest is I think I might have been sexually assaulted by a trans woman and don’t really want to admit it to myself emotionally, i’m not sure if it’s that. I think unfortunately the only person who could save me is a surgeon who knows what they’re doing in regards to shoulder reduction, like if that doesn’t get addressed I’ll probably rot in some capacity. I think the trans community is fine, it doesn’t really help have conversations about dysphoria but the only solution to dysphoria are better surgeries really so there’s not much said there.

I’m not really sure if I blend in/pass per say but I know when I take my clothes off what is in the mirror is grotesque and horrid and brick like objectively, never been gendered female so far outside of getting called honey once by some random man but I avoid the outside world alot of times, but being referred to by “guys” when im with my bf doesn’t seem to point to it looking hopeful.

its cruel and not worth checking out. I can already tell by the mirror that even surgery wont save me. I cant even cry anymore i just feel empty

im 19.5, possibly 20 inch bideltoid. i’ve been mutilated past recovery, the good times have been gone and will stay gone.

I turned 26 recently and its starting to feel like I am becoming one of the more older people in these spaces which to me suggests I need to at some point do something to address my dysprhoia sometime soon yknow. Also I’m sorry about your parents, I deal with alot from my father who doesn’t know I’m trans (hes probably in denial actively or lying that he doesn’t know to me, in an out of sight out of mind way) and my mom is slowly losing her mind and it’s definitely impacted me alot negatively.

(And I’m also clocky for some reason, I think, hopelessly so, still kinda passing though)

truthfully I have no idea how well I pass but I do have objectively very broad shoulders, even trans women have pointed that out to me so I assume I’m never passing from that

I wish I was a honlarper it would be god giving me a chance to breathe after 13 years of suffocating since male puberty this is not fun i wish i was anyone else

ive been on hrt for years i just feel like i don’t deserve it. im not stopping any time soon but i’ve given up socially doing anything because it feels unfair given my history.

This has always been my biggest gripe with 4tran spaces and it’s only became more and more frequent this past month, there’s like this inevitable swing from reactionary takes like this to nuggets of gold of interesting takes, cathartic posts putting things into words I wasn’t able to, and incredible art to nothing but a spiral into reactionary garbage like that comment. I don’t really know if transmed is the right word for them because the definition of that is silly. I feel like these days there two types of transsexuals, the ones who believe if you take hrt and you like the effects of it (including non-binary ppl), you were very likely dysphoric before therefore you are a transsexual, and the ones that believe from the getgo as a toddler you’ve had to have been so explicitly suicidal about your existence and outwardly express how much you want to be the other gender or and are desperately seeking srs later in life or you aren’t trans.

I take great issue with the latter tbh because even if they are ““pro-diy”” some of them are still outwardly antagonistic and divisive in a manner that makes me wonder what their end goal really is in the first place, like the takes and opinions they express will just lead to more confused people repping, their opinions cause more harm than good. Like I guess they are fine with “AGP CISSOID TRANSGENDERS” taking hrt, but they still resent and feel disgust towards them, and anyone who doesn’t perfectly fit in their category is whatever AGP AGAMP term. Functionally they are like one step away removed from the stereotypical transmed, the only difference is they don’t outright condone gatekeeping yet.

god hates us immensely and revels in our suffering