Didn’t do much, glad you got some sleep :)

I’m doing my best. Hope u r 2 :)

yknow i have no idea. google says yes, i was just raised religious (not really anymore) so i called it that because others did.

its why i do it you just have to also help yourself thats the hard part for me at least :(

“I’ve never cut deeper than a cat scratch, I’m such a larper.” this is what i told myself when i was actively whipping myself with a rope because i thought it would make me a better person. i had welts for days. its not a competition, its a form of coping, if not extremely neglectful/dangerous coping.

i killed my sex drive with extreme amounts of coping and probably a lot of estrogen. while i appreciate not having to masturbate with what i despise, it still is almost like a mental block. before that, i hated sex, but testosterone is a beast that really has no off switch. i think im asexual from chemical castration, but it wouldn’t be true to say im explicitly against sex, just against sex with the body i have. while it hurts, its probably the safest option for me, and it definitely lets me stay out of potentially dangerous situations i was putting myself in before. i still get turned on but i sort of regret the fact it is usually very abstract or just, imagining things without me really being there.

i will tell u outright she most likely doesnt hate u, she probably couldnt handle it. lost a lot of potential friends by oversharing trauma or not being a shining example of mental health, tho people who do understand or have more empathy can usually understand the trauma vomit or depression isolation or whatnot.

sounds like hes concerned but it is pretty traumatizing to find someone in the midst of a suicidal attempt. he cares about you and im glad hes there for you rn.

did you vomit or anything? you probably need to hydrate, eat, and rest to feel better, or else it may get worse. im glad youre okay but was really worried since you made that last post.

have a good rest!

vyvanse worked for me

those who do not acknowledge the past are doomed to repeat it. you dont need to talk about it but it made you you despite its outcasting events.

effortpost honestly. i completely agree, to my furthest understanding of what you have proposed.

do some rib flare exercises to see if it gets any better. dead bugs, breathing with your diaphragm, planks, exercises that make you pull your ribs down with your muscles and such for correct form. it might get better.

could be rib flare, do you exercise or do you find yourself sedentary?

ive heard its difficult, but im more of a pmd person to say the least. is it a good game to play?

c’est la vie

its probably hyper-vigilance to act in a way you want to be seen. to be honest, admitting your incompetence, or at least resigning your “self determination” or whatever and trust they can hold you. youll either get a bite or not, but thats just life in general. i couldnt tell you despite suffering the same sort of issue as well, but i just sort of gave up on people for the time being to be honest.

youre holding yourself to a standard that most people would fall under, honestly. you dont need to know how to do all of those things to be a real person. sometimes, admitting that you dont know something is the most human thing you can do, and sometimes people will actually bond with you by explaining it or just holding a conversation with you explaining about a topic. it is embarrassing to be in a situation you cant control, but by just regarding yourself a huge “loser” (which isnt true, you seem pretty cool from what ive seen you post so far), the only control your forcing is by putting yourself in a cell and expecting to be a better person because of it. i hope you can give yourself a little leeway, because you dont deserve how harsh youre being to yourself.

you know holding yourself accountable to the reactions of others is what makes you more likely to feel like you are only worth something when you are easy to interact with, right? you can still have interests that are outside of what “real women” interact with, and still be friends with “real women” by being an interesting, funny, nice, or just generally rounded person, and it wont detract from whatever limit you are holding over your head.