I dont even have “a self”… because I am just fully empty… why couldnt being a man be my true self, or being a musician, or a parent, a baker, an enby, a bisexual man, a car salesman, anything really… I have never given anything a shot in life… so tell me then… what is this “self” that you talk about because I look inside myself and there is nothing.
There is no dysphoria thought? I dont have genuine gender dysphoria probably… I am just projecting all my discomfort with existing, my depression and problems and all that unto masculinity because that makes it seem fixable. This is me just trying on another new custome in hopes that I will be loved. I am totally empty due to identity defusion. When somebody offers me an identity then I take it because maybe I will be loved. I used to be really religiously zealous because that was one of the few stable identities I had and I was actually a lot happier back then then I am now. Because now I am empty again. None of this is authentic. My entire psyche is all configured towards one goal. And that goal is to try and find attachment or “love” due to my borderline, due to me being simply unfinished and dyfunctional as a human subject.
There is no real dysphoria… just as there never was any real insanity or artistry or passion for anything. All that I am is an image artifically conjured so that I might be loved because I am empty inside but nothing can fill that void ever.
I wonder if most people simply feel more confident in their identity so dont relate much. I would post a similar sentiment if i could express myself better.
I never had it… at least not in any stable sense… my idea of self or goals in life was always tied to what would bring me admiration and love… even my current troon thougts are just another itteration of me trying to find a way to somehow be happy and be loved, so essentially trannymaxxing. I have no sense of self because I never developed one. It was true even in the past, before troonism
I dont even have “a self”… because I am just fully empty… why couldnt being a man be my true self, or being a musician, or a parent, a baker, an enby, a bisexual man, a car salesman, anything really… I have never given anything a shot in life… so tell me then… what is this “self” that you talk about because I look inside myself and there is nothing.
When you look inside yourself there’s dysphoria and it’s there for a good reason.
There is no dysphoria thought? I dont have genuine gender dysphoria probably… I am just projecting all my discomfort with existing, my depression and problems and all that unto masculinity because that makes it seem fixable. This is me just trying on another new custome in hopes that I will be loved. I am totally empty due to identity defusion. When somebody offers me an identity then I take it because maybe I will be loved. I used to be really religiously zealous because that was one of the few stable identities I had and I was actually a lot happier back then then I am now. Because now I am empty again. None of this is authentic. My entire psyche is all configured towards one goal. And that goal is to try and find attachment or “love” due to my borderline, due to me being simply unfinished and dyfunctional as a human subject.
There is no real dysphoria… just as there never was any real insanity or artistry or passion for anything. All that I am is an image artifically conjured so that I might be loved because I am empty inside but nothing can fill that void ever.
Waow most relatable shit ive ever read on here
But nobody responds to me
I wonder if most people simply feel more confident in their identity so dont relate much. I would post a similar sentiment if i could express myself better.
Hmmmm I wonder why you don’t have a sense of self when you try to shut it away 24/7… truly curious
I never had it… at least not in any stable sense… my idea of self or goals in life was always tied to what would bring me admiration and love… even my current troon thougts are just another itteration of me trying to find a way to somehow be happy and be loved, so essentially trannymaxxing. I have no sense of self because I never developed one. It was true even in the past, before troonism