I simply do not want the changes associated with further androgenization and I can more readily accept the gynoid hormonal changes. I don’t care or even know at this moment if I can/want to get all the way to passing as a woman. It’s both unlikely starting at 25 years old and not currently a practical goal. I want to change my body until I am happier with it. If that ending is estrogenized male I will have become less disgusting.
I only speak truthfully on here as there isn’t a point to posting anonymously. When putting into order what I want out of what I am doing to transform my body I would say it’s:
- To be slim but not visually defined and to not feel so fat/heavy anymore
- To reverse or as much as I can or at least to stop progressing of my Norwood 2ish as possible. Continue to grow my hair to waist length from the current hip length then make it very healthy and nice.
- To not have quite such intense disassociation and disgust when viewing my body in a mirror or image.
- To change enough to logically be allowed by others some amount of femininity. i.e. removal of body hair, allowance to expand clothing style (not sneedcentral skirts, dresses, and fishnets just to not have to purely be male blob), lowered judgement for the expectations related to choices of my interest (music, books, tv, etc)
There are other things but that’s what I thought of. Of course a ton of these rely upon those around me basically playing along but idk at this point.
Oh yeah last one #5 to change enough I stop making malebrained introspective analysis moding posts
Wow I like this. I think I’ll make my own list of “needs” for my transition and maybe it’ll be a reminder of what I’m even doing and possibly quell the faketrans doubting.
Clicked on your profile on accident then read bio. What do you think is your favorite album or a few if you can’t pick one? I like listening to new music no matter what it is.
My favorite album ever is Global Tourist Assembly by Voljum. The artist is schizophrenic and tries to take the music down but its on SoundCloud right now I think? Its not really for everyone so I don’t expect you to like it at all. I have more if you’re curious
I’ll check it out tomorrow.
This is a really nice plan for yourself. Great job.
This really means a lot I thought it was kind of stupid when I wrote it out. ty 🫂
I wrote something better then I refreshed the page on accident.
I’m trying to not succeed at my lifelong ED tendencies but as my #1 in retrospect kinda shows it’s not going perfect. I don’t want to catapult from one extreme of eating issue to another. Tried to find another therapist but he sucked gonna see if my county might have someone who isn’t a terf or some boomer marriage councilor.
