It doesn’t help anybody…
I am for example depressed, have trauma and lead an unhappy life with no purpose and that is filled with feelings of deep inadequacy.
And I ask myself… could it be that I want to be trans just because the idea of being a woman due to trauma has become something that feels safer to me (even if I’m man) than the idea of being with a woman and my wish to transition is just so I can fulfill some deep seated need… essentially instead of feeling adequate and confident enough to express my attraction to a woman and love a woman in a relationship, I instead try to love myself as a woman because I’m scared of failing or being inadequate as a heterosexual man
That plus my father’s abuse due to his extreme hypermasculine expectations and my sexual trauma from pornography have made me afraid and alienated from the idea of being a man and from heterosexuality.
And then I developed dysphoria after the fact… I literally said “okay I want to be a woman because I think then I can fulfill this deep seated need, but trans women need to have dysphoria so now I should start to feel dysphoria” and then and only then after starting to imitate what people said they were dysphoric about, did I start feeling it which to me seems like I induced dysphoria artificially.
Why… why isn’t that a viable explanation!
So here me out… what if hypothetically… this is the reason… would being a woman make you happier… if yes, transition… if no… sure don’t… just do what the brain tells you imo… I don’t care what made me trans, and I won’t rationalize it… because even if it is ROGD or daddy issues or smth, I don’t care, if I don’t transition, I’ll suffer and die… simple as
If this is actually the reason I am trans than my wish to transition is just maladaptive and I need to somehow become more confident in the idea of being a heterosexual man but that is entangled with so much of my past trauma that it feels almost impossible to resolve it…
Transition might make things worse… but I don’t know where to start when it comes to resolving the traumas that have given me that pathological wish to transition
I don’t know, neither will I push you to take a pill, all I’m saying is I think you’re being too obsessive over yesterday, that you are not looking at the problems of today. Like what if your parental abuse caused transness, there’s no guarantee there’s an ability to unfuck tha goat… and hoping there is kinda sisyphean and blind-sighted
Yeah… that’s a very valid point. But I think that the idea that I can’t undo the damage wouldn’t change that at the core there is damage. Either one can repair that or not. That’s the question. Maybe being gay works the same way. Maybe caused by trauma but not really changeable…
I personally though think being a man would be easier when we look at the state of the world and so investing in repairing it might be worth it