When I was 22 years old I decided to myself that I was going to transition. I even started doing some workouts to try and feminize my body — yes, “trap mode aesthetics”. But after a while it became clear that I was never going to be a woman and I just gradually went back to repping. That was 13 years ago. I didn’t know what HRT was. Now I’m 35. Now I’m fat. Now I’ve got a family and a career. My life on paper is great. But very often I think back and wonder what my life could have been if I had just started honmoding all those years ago.