I just went on /lgbt/ and what if I am just insane… that place seems more honest about it… about ugliness, messed up sexuality, feeling sick, being an incels trying to cope, feeling like freaks… its a place where the idea that being trans is actually something real isn’t accepted compared with here…
And it makes me ask myself… what if they are right?
What if I’m just a male incel with delusions, a messed up sexuality, social retardation, too much internet access to early, trauma and mental illness…
Am I actually trans, is being trans even a thing? Besides passoids, transness is just ugly, always… at least thats what people say…
Lookism is also important, maybe the most important thing… if you are not pretty… you don’t deserve love
Right?
You are right about that… I’m sorry… my mind just jumps to black and white so fast… I still have so much in me from the time I was really transphobic and the fears that all the ugly things they said are true is very present…
I will try to not post without thinking first. I also edited the post