just constantly thinking of death and suffering and failure and loss and sometimes there isnt even a concrete fear, just. fear. something. is happening. has happened. will happen. something bad. but i dont know what. i dont know what it is. but its very very bad.

i love you all, please be safe please:( i worry about all of you a lot:(

  • Madwoman
    2·
    4 days ago

    The night is a time when you can’t distract yourself with the outside world. You are left alone in the darkness, exhausted. Your body releases hormones that make you more relaxed and urges you to go to sleep, but you don’t. So instead you are attacked by all the feelings inside, but without the reins to stop them.

    • Fuwarei
      3·
      4 days ago

      I feel the opposite. Day grounds me in reality, night is a time without mirrors, and my consciousness wanders around the internet. I’m not present. Potentially it can also be the most dysphoric time ever, agonizing.

      • Madwoman
        2·
        4 days ago

        It is more or less what I meant. At nighttime there are less guardrails to stop your from being emotional and sensitive. You don’t need to perform or endure, the walls of self-control are very thin.