while i am still closeted there and still have my hideous man voice, the video was largely inspired by the feelings of having only started transitioning a year ago when i was just under 22 years old. that is the subtext which only you all are privy to. im a little bit disappointed with how the video turned out overall but i figured that some of you might enjoy it
my goal is to by the end of the year come out on my channel through a video that will rival ceciocat’s inside mari video. i need to start voice training asap
all of those old videos were made in the years leading up to me repping so they’re completely soured in my mind. that’s why they’re delisted. like with the video on kids’ cartoons, a lot of that was just me being a repper and hating myself cause i liked shows like owl house and infinity train but didnt want to admit it because i associated those shows with their predominantly female & queer audiences. and my fixation on western animation was largely born from me not wanting to accept that i was a weeaboo who only cared about anime. i still mostly agree with my assessment of how western animation is discussed online but from my perspective my whole presentation just feels like the ultimate reflection of me as a repper, and me hating my past self before i started repping. that’s why i was so angry all of the time. i’m glad that it at least made an impact on you, at least, in spite of how i feel about it. your words mean a lot to me