while i am still closeted there and still have my hideous man voice, the video was largely inspired by the feelings of having only started transitioning a year ago when i was just under 22 years old. that is the subtext which only you all are privy to. im a little bit disappointed with how the video turned out overall but i figured that some of you might enjoy it
my goal is to by the end of the year come out on my channel through a video that will rival ceciocat’s inside mari video. i need to start voice training asap
Good luck, youve been one of my favorite channels since even before i knew that youre on 4t4
how the fuck did you know about me before i was on 4t4 thats absolutely wild
It was from your “stop watching childrens cartoons” video, i think around 2024? You immediately cemented yourself in my mind as Ive never encountered something that went so deeply against the common narratives that surrounded western animation. And its like that for all your other videos too, an actual fresh prespective that needed to get out there somehow and not just slop that regurgitates the same common talking points like most other youtube content. You actually cared about the medium beyond its value as mere entertainment. And also you seemed in a state of constant vitriol at everything, everyone and most of all, yourself and you recount how deeply envious you are of other people and it was like i was listening to a clone. Of course, youre not that, but it felt that way. Hell, I think i rewatched your Look Back video over 6 times, kinda sad you unlisted it. Just strucked a cord with me as a failure of an artist who was starting to despise the very act of drawing despite it being the only thing they cared about. And honestly i never got it when people said you hated yourself because that kind of boiling hatred is mundane to me i dont even recognize it. Am sorry if this entire rabble is creepy. I think you permenately changed how i thought about art. Youre gonna make it as a youtuber and am not even throwing that out as an empty compliment. Youll get there because youve hitted a niche of neurotic, mentally unwell and contrarian people who care too much about the media they consume. Its like fucking crack cocaine to me. Its still unreal to me that youre in this community where everyone is kinda on the same level because i held you in such high regard. Sorry again, i clearly dont have people to talk to. I’ll delete this whole ramble if youd rather it not be here. This barely articulates my thoughts but it was too parasocial the moment i decided to typed the first letters
all of those old videos were made in the years leading up to me repping so they’re completely soured in my mind. that’s why they’re delisted. like with the video on kids’ cartoons, a lot of that was just me being a repper and hating myself cause i liked shows like owl house and infinity train but didnt want to admit it because i associated those shows with their predominantly female & queer audiences. and my fixation on western animation was largely born from me not wanting to accept that i was a weeaboo who only cared about anime. i still mostly agree with my assessment of how western animation is discussed online but from my perspective my whole presentation just feels like the ultimate reflection of me as a repper, and me hating my past self before i started repping. that’s why i was so angry all of the time. i’m glad that it at least made an impact on you, at least, in spite of how i feel about it. your words mean a lot to me
insane production quality
waow this is really really good!! (also good luck with voice training)
happy birthday!!
Thank you for sharing this with us 🥺
waow. good luck with the voice training!
oh i actually got this recommended to me through youtube, looks like the algorithm likes you somewhat
are you subscribed to me??? if not thats absolutely insane
i am not, but i have watched that one video we talked about a bit
ok first of all subscribe second of all that probably has something to do with it then but still, holy shit
dont forget to like and subscribe 😎
Good luck!!
funnily enough your channel got recommended to me too one time, good luck with everything
I need you to know that this video made me cry.
waow!!! i’m saving it for later! you’re a great orator btw good luck with voice training!
Oh I loved Scott Pilgrim when I was younger, watching now. Happy birthday and good luck!
Nice
You can do it! That inside mari video is legendary and you can absolutely do it too
