If I go there at night and it turns out there’s some suicide prevention measures in place im just kinda fucked cause buses don’t run that late so I could just end up stuck there
All the night bus services suck and none of them go anywhere near it
Might just have to either kms at day or od or something
No it wouldn’t
suicide is too final… if you kill yourself, you’ll never be able to return to life; however, if you choose to live now, you’ll always still have the option of killing yourself later. so, why rush it?
How am I rushing it if I’ve wanted to do this for the past like 7 years
7 years is no time at all in the grand scheme of things, especially not if you’re as young as most people here…
So what? Nothing has changed, actually it’s all gotten worse since then. Why should I not, when clearly nothing will ever get better?
because there’s still time for things to get better or, more accurately, easier to handle. we all inevitably go through shit that seems impossible to deal with at some point in our lives. when we’re in the thick of it, it’ll often feel like the pain is endless, but our perspective is too limited. you can’t know how your life will develop in the years to come. often, things turn out completely different to what we’d initially expected. that’s why you kinda just have to take a leap of faith: even if it feels pointless, you just have to keep living. i know it probably sounds completely irrational and just like the shitty go-for-a-walk–type of advice your therapist will give when you’re suicidal; but, to be honest, that’s because the choice to live isn’t one we make based on deductive reasoning. it’s only when we’re depressed that we delude ourselves into thinking we’re thinking objectively about life, weighing it’s positives and negatives. i can’t really convince you to live using logic, because it’s something that transcends logic and reason. the suffering feels unbearable now, but change is inevitable, and with time, the pain gets easier to manage. so, just give it more time. don’t rush headfirst into a room you’ll never be able to exit. as i said, suicide will always remain an option, so there’s no rush whatsoever to take advantage of it.
Massive wall of text to just say literally nothing
So you agree there’s not rly a reason for me to live then
there’s not really a single big reason to live, no… but there’s even less of a reason to die. if life truly matters as little as you say, why are you in such a rush to abandon it? using your own logic, the suffering you’re going through shouldn’t matter enough to affect you even slightly. the only reason that the pain matters is that life also matters. life is inherently meaningful, while death is the complete absence of any meaning. life will give you plenty of reasons if you let it do so.
to be completely honest, depression and it’s logical conclusion, suicide, are fundamentally egocentric: you have to stop the constant navel-gazing and direct your gaze outward. a logical reason to live will never just fall into your lap, but going through the motions of life will justify choice to live. things might never get easier, but you’ll learn to manage the pain; and, again, if life is as pointless as you say, why does the suffering even matter? you’re never going to get a convincing answer for why you ought to live, so stop looking for one and just keep moving through life instead.
Suffering matters because it hurts obviously?
How can you ever know the future?
Anything ever getting better is so statistically improbable at this point it’s not even worth considering
It isn’t. You can never know what fate may bring at your hands.