theres no emotional salve to ease the pain, theres no fix that can save them, no empathy or understanding is worth making it for them, and in the absence of hope it just comes off as sardonic
what can you even do for someone who wont make it
what can you even say to them? you can acknowledge their situation. high five while drowning dot jpeg. you can say oh maybe you still could make it and lie. hugboxxing. you can never outright agree with them because if they say ‘im a hon’ and you say ‘youre a hon’ those have two very different meanings. when someone says ‘im a hon’ theyre expressing dysphoria; when someone says ‘youre a hon’ theyre expressing the notion that they see the speaker as lesser, bc its worse to be a hon than a passoid.
( sure, it isn’t morally or inherently bad to be a hon, but i dont speak about morals and we dont live in a world where things are defined by their inherent properties. when a cissy says ‘you look trans’ it is an insult. it can be true and it is an insult; it can be not intended be an insult and it is an insult; it can be not perceived as an insult and it is an insult. )
you cant say anything or help them, just sort of talk about something else and distract them from the pain of not being able to make it. its kind of horrible. theyre sick people born into the world a hundred or two years before the invention of the medicine they need.
sorry if this comes off as condescending, i certainly dont mean it that way.
idk. all i ever look for is honesty. beyond that my reaction is no one else’s responsibility. like, im not gonna kms over an internet comment.
id only truly be offended if someone didnt try at all. it hurts to be hugboxxed and it hurts when someone doesnt understand, but its something they could never understand anyway. i think at some point its my own responsibility to recognize that i cant expect them to; its by no fault of theirs that their experience is so different than mine and that trying to empathize, while its never going to be enough, is still the very best they can do. i guess i see it as like palliative care in that ideally i just want people, especially the ones closest to me, to be honest and pragmatic in their treatment of me and not waste their time or mine trying not to hurt my feelings
you advice them to commit suicide ofc
🫡🫡
I can see why bdd passoids exist because if people told me I passed then I would think they were huboxxing
