Genuinely, I think I might have actual bpd. Everything checks out. That doesn’t mean that I don’t experience dysphoria somehow, but it is linked to my bpd. The way that my mood shifts, from paralyzing despair and feeling like I’m going insane, to then feeling happy 2-5 hours later. Dysphoria alone cannot explain it. At moments like that I usually feel dysphoric, but this is only a way for bpd to manifest itself. Really, the type of mood swings I experience cannot be explained by dysphoria alone. I also had a history of being easily irritated and explosive in anger in the past. Sometimes I feel so good like I’m on top of the world. My upbringing and family definitely played big part in all of this. Really, it all makes sense now.

But the weird thing is that gender incongruence diagnosis in my country requires the lack of bpd. I diy pilled myself, so should I stop? Should I ask my parents for a psychologist or something? I’m afraid that even if I transitioned and fully passed, that I’ll still have those mood swings. Now I understand why sometimes when I’m feeling extremely bad there’s no apparent reason(bpd), and sometimes it is just heavy dysphoria or both at the same time. Tomorrow is my injection day, but is what I’m doing really right? I’m also scared, I can’t grow breasts before family vacation, my buds are growing.

However, is it possible for dysphoria and self image to be so bad that it mimics the way that bpd works?