Jesus was an amateur magician and alchemist, all of his miracles can be explained with this theory,
The walking on water was a pier he built out that was just below the water level at the right point of the tide.
The water into wine was compressed cubes of dehydrated wine tannins that he slight of handed into the water.
The loaves and the fishes was a false bottom basket that he built which only activated when mounted into a box of salt fish he buried at the mound.
Curing the blind was just dialating an elderly persons eyes letting in more light
The death and resurrection was the same stuff Juliet drank to fake her death, near death, people were buried all the time alive cause medical tech sucked.
shut up jesus christ
deleted by creator
They told him to shut up for speaking the truth too insert the meme
i am telling him to shut up
Jesus was an amateur magician and alchemist, all of his miracles can be explained with this theory,
The walking on water was a pier he built out that was just below the water level at the right point of the tide.
The water into wine was compressed cubes of dehydrated wine tannins that he slight of handed into the water.
The loaves and the fishes was a false bottom basket that he built which only activated when mounted into a box of salt fish he buried at the mound.
Curing the blind was just dialating an elderly persons eyes letting in more light
The death and resurrection was the same stuff Juliet drank to fake her death, near death, people were buried all the time alive cause medical tech sucked.
you certainly seem charming
You can’t hurt me silly.
every morning when I touch my metro pass to the turnstile it tells me I’m “VALID” 🤗
(Charming AND funny 🥸)