life is a humiliation ritual but it’s extra shameful that no one can even be bothered to pretend to care. i love that i went to extended family that’s “supportive” because i was so unsafe with my parents and i couldn’t live alone because eastern european disabled tranny good luck with work! and they’re so supportive that i come home in a panic attack as you often do yknow and they can’t even be bothered to glance at me. i know we don’t talk to each other except when i ask them why they’re ignoring me and treating me like this in which case they bother to respond that it’s actually fine stop being hysterical or smth but like. wow ugh not even looking up from their phones like “of the freak that occupies the other room is here again”


I will never get used to having panic attacks and dealing with them alone while everyone around me aggressively ignores me if I ask for help, will I? hard to grow numb to this because of how intense it is emotionally. sucks to suck I guess