I’m about 27 years old and have been a neet the vast majority of the time since I graduated high school, I’ve worked 3 part time jobs here and there, never for too long, it probably only amounts to a little under a year in total time

Of course when I was younger I dealt with severe anxiety but… Never like this. I was an awkward kid. I never had much irl friends, only just a bunch of acquaintances I’d float around with. But I could at least bring myself to talk to people. Approach people I know even. Be able to somewhat express myself. Now everything is unthinkable. Even thinking of it freezes me up with dread. I might as well just have been an entirely different person back then but that’s a whole other topic.

This is the year I’m looking to break out of it, It’s no good to live like this. Though I fear I might not be able to bring myself to. Part of me doesn’t want to. It’s all I know practically. Though I know continuing this will be the death of me eventually. Not to mention my starting of transition around the same time as this.

I wish I could do this all over again. But no one gets that.