Not particularly suicidal or anything but like it’d be cool to be able to just always have the option I guess. Like a portable vial of poison or something. When I imagine myself always having an easy and immediate exit strategy always on my person it feels like life would be easier to move thru and stress would be easier to tolerate, idk am I crazy? I feel anxiety over not having a game plan for seeing myself out should I ever need to or want to go. Maybe figuring this out will get me to start applying for jobs again, I feel so optimistic and almost happy thinking about finally answering the question of method and acquiring the means, just to have it, y’know? Could this fix me?