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1. ⠀

2. im a cis straight man but no one believes me which is sad bcs i dont get any hawt trani newds

3. i‘m a theyfab /srs

5. I love Hentai NTR

6. So many of you are genuinely misogynistic its actually disgusting

7. I used to jerk off 3 to 5 times a day imagining myself having sex in a woman’s body, it was the only way I allowed myself to entertain my desire to be feminine for about 10 years.

8. i gave a trans girl a blowjob in the basement bathroom of a bar and that makes me think if i had never found 4tran adjacent spaces i probably would have been incredibly sneedy. this happened well after i had gotten into 4tran spaces though so idk

9. I have neverpasser strongman build but I’ll never post measurements so no one will know it

10. a lot of the time i feel too lazy to do trendslop, or i do the trendslop then never post it…

11. Despite thinking it was disgusting and wrong, I used to have a diaper fetish. I developed it as a child in response to a trauma. I still hate myself for it, even though it was the direct result of abuse.

12. is it weird that I gate some users but I don’t want them to hate me

14. some results i see in this place… yikes. Hppe you make it but itll be rough.

15. sometimes I wish I was an eevee in the pokemon world and I could be any form I wanted and I could travel the lands and have fun instead of being me because I am awful and gross tbh

16. I’ve been having serious thoughts about cheating and I don’t know how to fix it. I’m so fucking evil

17. I would detrans if my mother asked me to

18. I honestly think some of the trans women here (mostly 4chan and the reddit, most of them here are a bit better but still) shouldn’t transition, not bc of their appearance, but their personality. a lot of them are cruel and horrible for no reason, they also objectify women like men and genuinely infantalize women, for example: women can’t love other women, and women have to always do “fembrained” things, suggesting that women can’t enjoy certain hobbies bc it’s malebrained etc etc. I think there should be a training program to rub away these incel thoughts…

19. some people say and believe they pass and I’ll agree with them and hugboxx because I don’t want to break their cope

20. I have accepted that I would never pass long ago just doing all this as a promise to someone and told myself I would rope after 2 years I only have 1.5 years left

21. when I was with my ex gf I tried being a puppy girl to make her happy, she was a little girl and I pretended to be into it. Ffw she was weird horrible etc and I feel disgusting for it, I don’t like thinking about it

22. there has never been one person here i did not dislike

23. I live in constant fear that I am incapable of change and will forever remain a neet leeching off of my family. Also I like yaoi, fujoing out all the time.

24. I think I should be banned from the website bc my posts r annoying and everyone rlly hates me, they act like they like me but most of them truly despise my existence, and most are just indifferent or annoyed by me, only sharkmoder ever messages me anymore, she’s lovely but I fear she’s only doing it bc she’s scared I will kill myself or something and she doesn’t truly like me idk… the people I add here say they are my friends then never talk to me again bc I’m horrible to be around I’m truly scum

25. I hugboxxed a few ppl here, im sorry… 🐏 oh and sometimes when measurement posting i cant tell if someones a gigapassoid woman or unlucky man…

26. there is an impostor among us . . .

27. Lowkey i really want to suck gock for another trans woman.

28. I repped so much i bought a vr headset and started watching vr porn where i was in the woman pov

29. I genuinely love all of you and hope you make it in the future!!!

30. I have cried multiple times over worrying about what people here think of me , and normal jealousy.

31. a lot of you are really uncomfortably weird

32. Sometimes when I’m high and sortfagging I notice alot of you are doing borderline age regression things. I haven’t said anything about it to anybody because I was going alright hell yeah touys :)

33. While I enjoy everything else about starting HRT, the only thing I want back is my ability cum. I want to shoot ropes.

34. I am jealous of “insurance covers my top surgery” people. This jealousy grows stronger with each passing year. I can’t even get it in the country I am from. I am fighting for my life against the growing bitterness.

35. I plan on becoming essentially a supervillian on the future and just throwing this whole tranny thing away because I’m so done with it, fuck being a brickhon, instead I want to be feared, not mocked

36. When I was around 8 years old I beaten up some girl at school, I don’t remember anything else, I don’t remember if I was punished or if beating was bad or not, I to this day feel really bad about it and sometimes cry

37. I would never in a million years hang out or be friends with anybody on here save for a handful of people if it weren’t for the fact that we’re all unstable and insane

38. I wish I was more social because some of you are really cool but I’m really shy and doomed to lurk forever

39. recently i deadnamed my tranny friends when talking to my mother cause i was embarrassed to admit they were trannies… i have issues with parent approval and i lie a lot to her because of that, despite being a fucking adult… they still boymode and stuff and my mother thought that they were gays or smth… i should be publicly executed and i deserve to be a manmoder ugh…

40. I’m a semi-passer on hrt but I’m genuinely trying to transition & have put in so much effort to actually try and look, act and sound like a woman to the point where I boyfail sometimes in public and am out to a few close people.

The problem is though, a friend of 6 years (who does not have any other friends except me and who i’ve introduced them to) told me they were a trans woman however they’ve never even acted effeminately ever and have 0 social skills and everyone thinks they’re weird. I’ll call them R. R is ngmi and gives off somewhat rapehon vibes (due to being weirdly oversexual).

The thing is, I need good optics to come out to my friendgroup (mostly all girls), so I told R to rep and tell me before telling anyone else, since they trust me a lot as their ‘best friend’. Its probably a little backstabby, but the thing is, they’re bad optics, and I don’t want R stealing my well earnt attention until I’ve set a good impression of trannies first to my friends.

The thing is, i’ve been through so much pain and bullying to pass and this attention grabber doesn’t even meet the lowest standards i set of myself, and honestly, i’ve done more to earn transitioning than someone who is a neverpasser and doesn’t even soulpass (they have the most masculine malebrained hobbies and job ever). Wtf do you mean you’ve never even tried to learn makeup.

now the thing is, i thought about it the other day and it’s probably a little unkind, but i don’t see anything else to do tbh. if anyone has advice i’ll listen cuz i know i’d kms if i had to rep forever but I’m sure R will be okay cuz they’re genuinely so malebrained.

[TO THE MOD: IF I DECIDE TO RESPOND TO ANY COMMENTS, SO YOU KNOW IT IS ME, AND NOT SOMEONE ELSE, I’LL SAY THE CODE ***** AT THE START OF MY NEXT MESSAGE]

41. I tried to have sexual relations with a dog when I was 12. No, I wasn’t loved. Lots of sexual abuse from humans. I’ve never abused/raped an animal ever and I love them. My younger, past self still concerns me though. I’ve found solace in learning that this isn’t exactly uncommon.

42. I made fun of someone when I was 10 and I still regret it so deeply. Made fun of her facial expressions and laughed with my classmates. That’s my only instance of bullying thankfully

43. i probably could semi-pass once i makeupmaxx and voice train but i’m too afraid of actually transitioning.

44. i doom a lot about my face and still havent done my brows

45. I often get the feeling I’m odd even for a 4tranner and fear not to be in touch with the other users. I want to contribute, but I don’t know how well I actually do that. I want to help the people here, even if we may not understand each other very well.

46. I am extremely transphobic and say awful things to other undeserving sneeds and I feel really awful and guilty after but I often tell needs on video games to commit suicide and ywnbaw and such.

47. i have done the exact same thing as #30, i get sooooo jealous over some of you it’s embarrassing

48. Internalized misogyny is genuinely kicking some of your asses but it’s okay. I still love you 💙

49. i had means and intention to engage in nclear terrorism (in minecraft) for troon rights, decided against it though

50. I know that some hate me here - for a fact. That arouses me.

51. The reality of sexual dimorphism necessitates surgical reconstruction for those who do not meet passing standards naturally. Visual non-compliance with these standards creates a negative external perception for the collective. Therefore, medical intervention is the only path forward. In the absence of such intervention, withdrawal from the public sphere is the expected conduct. Do not ruin the perception of others who are not unfortunate like you may be. -j

52. i only have 24 cans of monster energy left in my stock pile. fuck my stupid life.

53. Some ppl here are so boring. They do funny post, eventually you will have a private chat and they wont ever ask anything, just talking about themselves. I cant blame them for that tho.

54. I love interacting with other trans people, but long term the fact they all still act like hormonal teenagers gets really grating.

55. I feel that I have been known to honlarplarp, like people probably think I think I’m less of a hon than I know I am tbhon

56. Before I get srs I want to experience one footjob

57. I genuinely think this will be shut down in a day at most.

59. I’m waiting for somebody to realize I haven’t been posting for a week. When somebody does I will start posting again. I don’t know why I am doing this. Even though I said goodbye I don’t want to leave at all.

60. “If I lack even this bit of ambition, what’s the point of being human? Failure is fine, just try again several times. Even if I cannot achieve my goals in the end, so what?” -FY RI Some of you bitches should listen to him

61. I transitioned because of sissy and forcefem porn. It was the only way I could love myself during my repper days. Only realized because I said I wanted to be a girl in a non-sexual way and someone pointed that out. After that I completely stopped watching it and then developed dysphoria.

62. sometimes I wonder how many of you truly despise me for what I am and what I post, I am cringe and annoying and idk I feel like you guys have a secret groupchat where you all mock me, including the site admin… I feel like you guys view me as a baby 14 year old boy because of how I act here. I feel kinda horrible idk :c I’d post this but I don’t want you guys to see who made this message bc then you might hate me even more again and get tired of me constantly asking if you hate me

63. I’m much more brutal and violent and cutthroat and extreme than I seem. Also I’m much more judgey but I find it hard to express even though I would like to. I’ve found myself to be a lot more hugboxxy because I wanted to spread positivity in the shithole that is 4tran. Sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t care but the world deserves more positivity.

64. Some of y’all being sad if I died is legit a primary reason for me staying alive, even tho a part of me struggles to believe anybody would really care all that much, as I’ve struggled to really connect with anybody here. I like to think I’d have an easier time becoming proper friends with some of y’all if I wasn’t practically being held prisoner by my ex who still lives with me under threat of suicide, and has isolated me to the point that sparse interactions on here and sneaky toilet phonecall correspondences with my girlfriend are my only interactions with the outside world. It’s been 13 months of isolation.

65. Hugboxing/hateboxing are fucking evil and do irreparable damage to people

66. I am an minor

67. ttttinkle should be revived

68. Trannies with abuse fetishes are kinda like women with rape fetish

69. i did femboy porn mostly revolving around my peener, have been seen 10 of thousands of times

70. i feel guilty if i dont sortfag at least for an hour a day

71. In sophomore year I sexually harassed every one of my friends and pushed them all away. I’ve been doing this all my life, since I could remember. I even think I made some cis girl attempt. I am a rapehon and chaser in my soul. I know if I ever make new friends I will repeat that. I don’t deserve to call myself a woman or trans

72. i am the most evil human being in the planet because of my feelings

73. I feel really bad for a lot of you. The lot of you are so fucking pathetic about your lives. You constantly compare yourself to others and never actually start on working yourself other than starting HRT, if even that. Get the fuck up, no one is coming to save you.

74. The night before I took my first dose of estrogen, I celebrated by jacking off upside-down and giving myself a facial.

75. I have a chronic disorder that I can’t stop joking about my 2 friends (who are siblings) dating each other and it’s ruining my life

76. LSD would probably kill some of you but, would also help many

77. I do believe most of 4tranners standards for transition is anime girls they jack off to. Most of ya’ll need to go outside more.

78. imma mostly avg masculine man who enjoys PIV with my natal vulva. topping and bottoming. i’m not interested in having a penis/balls. and i think seahorse fathering is sweet. invasive PIVpoon species, sorry… id never say this stuff to 4tran4.

79. I like watching gore videos. Also sometimes I go on /lgbt/ and call people hons and tell them to kill themselves or say the most insane vile takes just because I find it entertaining, even if I don’t actually believe any of it. I don’t feel bad about it.

80. Blanchard is completely unironically onto something

81. My weight gain fetish was probably the first agp thought I ever had. Chubby girls were attractive to me. I was like 12 at the time. I remember wishing to gain weight to be chubby, but only if I was a girl.

82. i try to be positive here but its a larp, its genuinely pretty likely that ill kill myself in the next few years

83. I genuinely ruined my mother’s life by being mentally ill but I still think she’s an insufferable cunt and want to cut contact with her asap

84. when I was 16 and my mind was fried from dysphoria, I would derealize so bad that I don’t remember entire months straight. during those times I was extremely mentally abusive to my ex girlfriend. she was deeply in love with me even through all my pain and hurting but I would ignore her completely, refuse to hold hands or kiss, play a lot with her feelings, tell her how much I never loved her, cheat on her online, use her only for sex, tell her she should kill herself (she had attempted multiple times before) and make her cut to “earn my forgiveness”. when we talked about it years later she didn’t want to call it that, but I wouldn’t bat an eye if she called that me raping her. she still thinks I am that type of person, and how could I ever pretend to ask for forgiveness after that. anything bad that happens to me in my life is earned, and is just consequences of my action. as much as I regret it and as much as I feel bad about it, nothing can change that I am a horrible person and I am someone’s abusive ex they still cry about from the trauma years later. I have told this to no one, and no one in my life has a clue. not even the people we both knew.

86. io Have. 1 Person blocked ,Here

87. I’m so fucking stuck you wouldn’t imagine. I just want to take all my lorazepam and add some quetiapine to end all of this bullshit.

88. in all of the wet dreams ive had, ive always had a vagina. even when i was a teenager before i knew i was trans. i need srs so fucking badly

90. I never really talk about my mental health because of the attention it brings. I usually look quite positive but if I’m going quite awfully. I hold myself and others to different standards when it comes to this. I’m chill with other people posting their problems but when I do it, it’s awful and disgusting.

91. I sent a (mildly nsfw) picture of myself to a certain someone here and it felt so nice when she complimented it. I kinda want to feel that thrill again but idk how. THE PERSON WHOM I SENT THE PIC TO BETTER NOT OUT ME HERE

92. Some of you actually deserve euthanasia as mercy. how do you keep living?

93. I sexually harassed a girl once and that experience and the consequences from that completely flipped my life upside down. I will always hate myself for this. The guilt is worse than dysphoria.

94. Some fitttts posters are just mediocre twinks.

95. If you still fail to pass even after trying, maybe it’s not meant for you nona. Settle for being a twink.

96. i would rather be a man without tranny thoughts than a female. i wish i wanted to be a man, or at least didn’t want to be a woman

97. being a trans man is 100x worse than being a trans woman

98. i miss someone on here, she posts rarely but we used to talk on discord. she was really nice but i think we stopped talking because i cant hold conversations very well.

99. I was unironically a sissy in my early teens and before. I would steal my mom’s clothes and stare at myself in the mirror and would get aroused. I would thigh tuck and imagine myself with a vagina and then jerk off. Every wet dream I had was having a vagina and getting fucked. Yeah… agp final boss. I probably don’t deserve to transition.

101. I hate all of you

102. I used to be flexible enough to be able to suck my own dick, and I’d do it all the time, constantly swallowing my own cum in the process and developing a real taste for it. I told my all-male friend group about it at age 13 during a sleep-over, and they didn’t believe me, so I sucked my own cock in front of all 6 of them. I was already designated as the faggot of the group by then, but that really solidified it. P.S. sucking your own dick feels more like sucking a dick than it feels like getting your dick sucked, and that was exactly the appeal to me. I wish I still had that capability.

103. I have over 40 bottle of wine in my room and theyre all empty.

104. When I learned about lucid dreaming, a long time ago, my first thought was becoming a girl. The thought made me so happy. How I didn’t realize… I don’t know.

106. I believe in the complete abolition of sex as an identifier. I’m also a marxist.

107. Puppymodders and age regressors who don’t actually have trauma (an excuse for behavior) give everyone here such a bad fucking wrap it makes all of us look like burdens, my ex was one and it was one of the worst relationships I’ve had.

108. A lot of you are cool tho but it sucks being trans

109. prog probably makes me hornier than t ever did lol

110. I hate to say this too but one of the reasons I try to talk to every person I see about suicide or like them wanting to die or having trouble is to feel the closest thing to being a mother of a child. That and it sucks being used and thrown away or just trampled on.

111. I don’t actually like diapers

112. pizzaboy is still lurking on this website, I am friends with her… she posts frequently

113. sometimes i will cry after reading something here

115. I unironically don’t think my self-conception has grown much beyond my trapmode aesthetics days on 4chan. I basically see myself as a shemab hrt femboy who will kms if I don’t trick others into thinking I’m not a moid. I don’t even have too much internal dysphoria around seeing myself as a moid. It’s just other people. For some reason, if people who are not my life partner found out I’m just an estrogenated guy who full-time girlmodes, that’d make me wanna kms, that’d make me move cities, as I very-much wanna deep-stealth, but I unironically would take having a penis with testicles that produce estrogen over having ovaries and a vulva 100% of the time if that was a choice, and that just makes me a fucking moid yeah? Being called a woman doesn’t even feel good, in-fact it feels rather bad and wrong, but being called a man feels like I’m dying, so wombynhood-passing is just my comfort-zone. Identity hurts, fagmoding pre-hrt broke me, I think.

117. I was going to write about how I hate the fact that since childhood I hated the fact to being male and I was envy of the woman around me, but then later i found out about this part of myself just from porn being a teenager, then later femboys, I feel that I don’t deserve to never transition, to never fell fine in my body, I deserve to rot in this corpse filled with T, sometimes I see photos of me as a child and think maybe if I just know this in another way or even younger I didn’t end up as what I am, maybe I will have the idea of a future, but I am stuck in this corpse, I used to think that I will not pass 18, but here I am at my 20s writing this, that was just a lie I say to me because I am a coward. when I was a child I always wanted to grow my hair, even that I wasn’t allowed I remember not saying or doing what I really liked even just stupid drawings that I made in the back or end of the books in 2nd grade was bad, every time that my family obligated me to have a haircut I always cried after that, the only thing I was allowed to enjoy was cartoons or videogames but that was for freaks I was going to write a bigger rant but tbh rn I am only crying and I am not capable to do that in a way that is understandable, I am sorry is something is wrong my first language isn’t English, best of luck if someone read this

118. please be nicer everyone

119. i really wanna see kath make it and go back on E

120. I want a boy to stick his cock into my butt right now please please please. I will let him do anything to me I don’t care at all

121. I’m a 15 year old boymoder and I use this site. Boymoding in high school is honestly hell though

123. confession #33, idk who you are but id let you shoot ropes all over my tits and ass, and let you fill me.

124. I drank my own piss once, it was kinda salty

125. I get horny when I fantasize about myself in gory situations, like having my bones broken, my flesh sliced, my face disfigured (hmmm perhaps by acid), blood everywhere and stuff like that

126. From time to time I masturbate before bed and don’t clean myself; I like the feeling of wet panties against my body. One day I want all my friends to ejaculate in my panties and make me use it all day. I hope I managed to already get the SRS that day. And may they all fuck me… I love my friends, I want to have sex with all of them… And sometimes with my brother too… I wanted to be the center of attention in a gang bang done only by the men in my life

127. In middle school I would imagine beating up my sisters rapist constantly and I eventually planned on stabbing him I brought a knife to school and everything many times I just couldn’t ever find him. I actually never saw him again.

128. i feel like I’ve completely fried my empathy circuits. I remember I was so kind until not so long ago. Maybe I was just pretending it all, either my autistic ass learning to feign emotions better, hrt making me act up, or even just a form of mental masturbation, to feel good about being a good person when I had nothing else to feel good about. But now I don’t feel anything, I see people ranting here and if anything I think “thank god that isn’t me”, I saw someone I knew in passing getting fucked by life and I just felt inconvenienced, I don’t miss my friends anymore, I don’t bother to reach out. I outright hate some people irl and online now, I feel superior to them. I feel like if my grandma died tomorrow all I would care about was whether I would inherit anything. I ignore people that in the past I would put up with even if it hurt me. Recently I’ve noticed I’m outright taking advantage of people and not feeling a bit of shame about it. I’m afraid that I don’t even love my partner, that I’m unironically only in it for sex, getting taken care of and the prospect of money and stability later.

129. I only jack off to tentacle hentai where it’s tentacle monster x woman because any time I see a penis in porn it reminds me of what I don’t have. Fuck my stupid pooner life.

130. i know i’m a passoid. i honlarp just for the hell of it. you know who i am. lol.

131. Loose Sandwich, at some point, you have to tell her you’re a man. You can’t lie to her forever

132. I pass without makeup, idk why I’m here :/

133. I found 4chan when i was like 12 or 13, and even tho i stopped visiting years before realizing im trans and finding 4t4/tranistan, i think it really fucked up my personality and worldviews in the long run way more than i realized…

135. I uploaded pictures to nsfw websites where I regularly topped the like counts, noone knew I was trans. I’ve probably had hundreds of men cum to me. I don’t regret it.

137. I have a crush on one of you

138. I’m a triple trumper :/

139. i want a orchi but do like my balls sometimes, i wish they didnt produce t :((

140. I used to be a webcam model before transitionining… Thousands of men jacked off to me while I was acting all cutesy on camera. Half of them didn’t even know I was basically just a twink in makeup and a wig. The money I earned paid for me to get on HRT.

141. I make fun of self proclaimed hussies for saying autogynephilic stuff like “Having a man’s dick inside you makes you feel like a woman” as if I myself don’t get validation from being fingered by a woman

142. I have a diaper fetish and I’m super ashamed of it.

143. I truly want to become futanari

144. i cleaned a wrinkly smelly crusty dick with my mouth and swallowed after. and i loved it. i dont deserve love because im exactly the whore from redpill memes.

145. I think a medication pushed me into something like hypomania while I was taking it. I slept 15 hours over 4 days. I look through my computer and find projects I’d forgotten about. I wasn’t really happy, I was kinda angry. there was other stuff but like idk I dont remember much. The real confession is that I never told anyone.

146. I admit this on here publicly, but I do spend an amount of time other people would call worrying in blackpill spaces. I’m leftist and I believe in women’s rights, and I guess I can see the argument that they’re somehow eugenistic but I just can’t get myself to care. It’s funny because genuinely no-one can tell. One of these days someone will find out and my friend group will implode over it.

147. i have a bidirectional oedipus complex

148. I’m obsessed with fembrain/malebrain. I refuse to listen to songs made by women until it’s three am and I allow myself a single Jane Remover song. Sometimes I think my breathing pattern is feminine and it makes me want to ropemaxx. Maybe this is a mental illness but therapy is too fembrained for me to consider beyond getting my letters.

149. When I was a pubescent child, like very early into puberty, I had like a handful of incestous dreams, probably because of how emotionally fucked up my entire family was at the time and still is…

150. im too scared to go outside i have no friends and the only people i talk to are a few moids i met online that i dont even like

152. I faked being suicidal just before going away on holiday for a month where I wouldn’t have any internet access. Purely for the attention I would get from the rest of the community and to see what people actually thought of me. Also the fast I was going away for a month would help make it seem like I actually did off myself because I wasn’t logging in.

153. i can’t keep going, every day it gets worse and worse, i can barely get up from bed and i fucking know i will kill myself in the near future but im too much of a fucking coward to tell people im not okay, im so damn afraid that if they knew im struggling they’ll go away, and the worst part is that even if i gained the courage to ask for help i can’t even tell the truth cuz im a goddamn tranny, guess im fucked either way, i’ll prob just keep rotting away wishing i was a normal woman not a fucking hulking horrible monster

154. I genuinely am dysphoric and would hate if someone wanted me for my dick, but also almost exclusively masturbate to futa porn :/

155. some of you have the most malebrained typing styles ive ever witnessed and it always makes me see the person as a man

156. I eat pizza from crust to tip slice by slice.

157. I sometimes don’t know if I really have intense bottom dysphoria, pre-transition having the rapestick just felt weird and sometimes a bit uncomfortable. And under some circumstances I can enjoy using it. I maybe just brainwashed myself with the idea that I as a tranny should really hate it at all times.

158. i used to jerk off to gender bender hentai. not the degradation kind (though ig coercion was often part of it) but the type where a depressed twink magically turns into a gigapassoid with a womb and has bliss and euphoria painted all over her face and is fucking crying from joy. often these things ended with the trans girl having sex with her girlfriend who has a penis (which is luckily censored because rapesticks are gross) and then she becomes pregnant and they both become mothers and get married and are just full of love and happiness. insanely malebrained. this honestly proves i’m faketrans more than anything else. and i still sometimes do this. maybe once a month. i’m sorry you have to be surrounded by gross malemonsters like me on here. i hate that my rapestick and poison center drove me to do this and probably made me get on hrt as well :(

159. io Unblocked, the1 Person. i Had Blocked Here

160. i like to self insert as garou from one punch man. only actual male character i self insert as because i relate a lot to him despite being in different circumstances. i feel a lot of empathy for him and i sometimes listen to the longing song. i like to think that i’d literally just be him if i was a cis moid, besides all the fantasy stuff you know

161. nevber, Mind i blocked. Heragain i Saw. a Diaper Post

162. i often think how many of yall are actually sneedy and just larp being purists for the sake of conformity

163. I have an active psyop going on with my friends. I said one time “I’ll always be fucking X” and now they think it’s my deadname.

164. I let a fellow tranny down and still cannot muster the courage to talk to her again

165. i was r/4tran lurker and board lurker in 2021 and did nothing because i was an unironic “repchad” (kill me please).

168. I need a babytrans gf who I mog so hard, but ill console her and give her infinite love and shell bloom to be a gigapassoid, GOD I WISH.

169. oh and also she gotta do piv, the babytrans gf.

170. I really love you, but I’m boring person and I feel like a misfit even here, so I prefer to stay alone. If someone likes me I gently push them away

171. My tiny feet are the only part of me that fully passes as female and I love sending them to people

172. im a 5’11 dood and i fucking hate the idea of st4t. i want to date a woman, not an overemotional bpdemon

173. Sometimes I enjoy giving false hopes to pre-hrt trans, just so they think they can have luckshit results.

175. i have a diaper fetish but I feel guilty about it because it’s fembrained and also I don’t have childhood trauma so I can’t use that as an excuse for my disgusting fetishes.

179. most of you will hate me if you found out I used to be very transphobic.

180. I pity hons I want to tell them that they ngmi but that will be too mean

181. Nobody truly passes. Doesn’t matter if started hrt at 14 twinkhon at best. A lot of your typing is malebrained too and should talk to cis women more often to fix years of male socialization.

182. I am girliepop alt jk oram I

183. i think I groomed myself into being a poon. As a kid I used to be a tomboy, hated anything that had to do with girls and women. In middle school I became a stereotypical theyfab. I even had neopronouns and dressed like a slut. Then I came across /tttt/ and the post there gave me brainworms, I realized that is wasn’t just a silly exploration of gender expression, that my bones wouldn’t drastically change with testosterone, and I started panicking, trying to get on hrt before puberty ended. As of now I’m extremely dysphoric, hrt saved me and even helped me with cognitive functions, but I can’t help but think that I groomed myself into becoming dysphoric and that if I never discovered 4tran I would be a theyfab to this day.

184. I would be down for a hookup with all of you, that aren’t 30+ years old because of the age gap, if we lived close; and from the reactions I get on fitttts a lot of you would actually accept the offer. smile anons and nonas, someone out there would enjoy fucking with you

185. The person above who tried piss, I get you and it is salty

186. Breast forms are comfortable and made me feel better about my appearance

187. pizza & pasta have permanently left 4t4 and tranistan as of a little over a week ago and anyone saying they’re still posting isnt up to date

188. i genuinely wish i could be in a relationship with my dad

190. i have no idea who tf aubrey is and what she tries to talk about all the time

191. People here, on the board and the sub insist I’m a passoid but I genuinely think I look revolting and I think about killing myself often. I don’t know if I’ve just completely lost the ability to see myself accurately but all I see is who I was before and it’s killing me. So to make myself feel better I post obvious bait posts to make bitterhons mad at me for being prettier than them. I don’t really believe it and it doesn’t change how I see myself but that momemtary rush I get from feeling better than someone else distracts me from wanting to die just a little. Thing is, I think people are sick of my bs now so they just ignore me mostly.

193. i sometimes feel very comfortable having a penis and then get revolted after for thinking that (mtf)

194. I always read the username ribb0n_rabb1t with French pronunciation in my head

195. Desiresaregrey can you like smoke weed instead. Drinking is cringe and weed is healthier and cooler

196. Some of you here are genuinely mean spirited only in ways I have seen from teenage girls and it is quite sad and pathetic. Please fix your hearts. Love one another. It’s all we’ve got in this world.

197. I could probably pass irl despite my height and bricky face if I just got better at voice training instead of being stuck at the half way male faggy voice I have right now.

198. I gooned to the American horror story conjoined twin sex scene several times when I was like 13 because I thought my family would see what websites I use on the electricity bill

199. i rarely share it but i have a micro penis. i sometimes see doods dooming over their t dick sizes on here and on r4t4 but theyre genuinely way bigger than me. buddy you have nothing to worry about you sizemog millions of cis men trust me

200. i attempted suicide back in senior year of high school and when i came back no one seemed to care where i was for the last two months. this was 6 years ago and it still haunts me that i was delusional to think all the people i knew up to that point didn’t really care about what i did or where i was. i think id be probably better off dead to them

201. When I was a kid I used to beat up my classmates for fun and only stopped because I was sick of getting punished for it. I get more pleasure out of physically harming others than I’d ever get out of sex but can’t do anything about it because I’m too much of a prude for bdsm and no woman would ever get off to having a ugly flyweight dickless manlet beat her

202. i have 0 idea what my orientation actually is, before i realised i was a tranny i used to be exclusively into men, i had a whole gods greatest homophobe phase for like a few months at 11 or so before i came to terms with the fact that im into my male classmates, after which i started really leaning into the whole femboy act because it gave me male attention and they would like grope my thighs and stuff after school when we hung out. one even told me “if you were on estrogen id date you”. i started watching porn at the beginning of my T puberty and i think slowly i conditioned myself into having an attraction towards women, however it was always something very different from the attraction i felt to men, it was way more impulsive, literally just a crotch feeling, and i despised it like nothing else. i still have it, and because of it ive on multiple occasions messed with my estrogen doses, because higher doses extinguished my libido almost entirely. this made me severely mentally unstable for multiple months, made me develop dpdr while it was happening. my attraction to men feels almost fake now, because i cant tell if im actually feeling attracted to them or if im just overcompensating because im afraid of being agp. blanchardism is everpresent in my mind as an intrusive thought and i cant break myself free of it, so ive pondered whether im faketrans because of this so many fucking times. i dont feel romantic attraction to women, i dont want to actually have sex with them. i also used to be pretty agp before hrt. im kinda scared that ill regret srs because of this.

203. i once stepped on a dead baby bird and felt the bones crack under the sole of my foot, the reverberations from it spreading through my body. it felt good

204. I am in love with my Mum. Full on Oedipus Complex

205. i started hrt @ 16 and i’m genuinely kinda pisses that so many oldshits mog me and that i’m a hon, like wtf???

206. whenever people talk abt how heccin fembrained/malebrained another troon is for doing something i recoil inside, urgh they are real in a sense but not in so much that you should bring them up for individual actions n atuff

207. I know im probably straight but I still run like 50 calculations in my head everytime I look at a woman to verify that im not sexually or romantically attracted to her

208. Whenever I share good news about myself, I tell my boyfriend, “Let’s see how many girls I can make kill themselves today.” And together, we laughed at their GIWTWM

209. It makes me feel better when other people tell me to kill myself out of jealousy

210. I hate man, but caught myself daydreaming about kissing Louis Antoine de Saint-Just

211. I have opened every single post on tranistan.com and almost evry single one on 4t4 for the past year excluding the weeks that sub was private. never posted on either site what the hell is wrong with me I know way too much about random 4tranners

212. As a kid my sister would bully me and give me wedgies, I ended up with a wedgie fetish. I still hate my self for it. After hrt the appeal stopped being as good but I’m too dyphoric to masturbate to porn I actually like and can’t relate to most smut because I don’t have a vagina which is like the most important part of lesbian stuff. When my dyphoria gets bad and nothing else works masturbation is like the only way to half forget I’m a tranny. It makes me hate myself so much, it’s ether wedgie art or femininization hentai, one I try to imagine what life could be if I grow up as a cis girl and the other because I wish someone would force me to be a woman and get me surgeries. I get sad at both one I’m basically a loser the other I’m a sex slave.

Honestly I hate both I hate how this is my fantasy I wish I could just imagine a normal bdsm sceno but it doesn’t feel like I’ll ever get that.

Honestly I wish I could just do wedgies with a girlfriend and genuinely feel happy.

But I’m a tranny so Ill never bring up wedgies if I have cis girlfriend because I’ll just look like a freak and pathetic because of my shoulders.

Also my favorite sceno is when ether I’m tied up to bench in a locker room with an atomic and the female bully pinches the underwear so it goes into the lips and I silently cry because I’m gagged and she says “i love it when they cry, god it must fucking hurt I can’t imagine how much pain your in” Or any scenario with crotch rope/bondage.

I know I lost all empathy points but I literally can’t talk abt this to anyone.

I wish I had a vagina so much not a disgusting fallus

213. Sometimes when people doompost about being in completely fucked up, similar situations as me I try to help them/at least try to make them feel better because nobody has ever really done the same for me, and I know how much that sucks and hurts. Other people here should do the same, I understand that theres limitations to what really can be done, considering it’s a tranny forum on the internet and lots of the people are probably strangers, but I think a lot of us are extrememly isolated and lonely like I am and I know it would’ve meant a lot to me if anybody reached out like, ever to check on me, or even cared before I was literally about to attempt suicide. Idk.
214. i will side with ANY tranny over a cissoid. idc what they did or didnt do
215. i’ve never really vented or expressed my inner emotions to anyone and i’m not sure i know how to
216. Sometimes I say certain things so that mar calls me a woman, because I like being called a woman and it never happens outside of Tranistan…
217. I’m a lesbian :(
218. i’m thinking of asking my crush out when i see her next! (t4t)
220. i really wanna be collared and leashed up (obviously pull it) and called a pathetic whore while being bent over the edge of a bed or a table or a counter and have my sopping boycunt pounded into while my hair is being grabbed and my face is being pushed into into whatever surface it’s pressed against :3 bc im just such a good boy :333
221. I’m a lurker, and despite having watched this community and associated spaces (4t4, board) for around 3 -4 years I only started HRT 2 months ago. I was too much of a coward to take hormones while I was in highschool and so I delayed knowing I would later regret it. I’m so alone and I wish I could bring myself to talk to everyone here, but I don’t think I ever will.
222. i have had sex a couple times, but haven’t cum all year, from any of them, its whatever
223. Still in love with my ex, and it makes me feel disgusting and male that I am.
224. I’m a late realizer (ROGD) repressor in my late twenties and I don’t plan on living many years longer. The discomfort dysphoria brings me is so intense it makes me want to tear this body into pieces. HRT and surgeries can’t undo the monstrous masculinization anymore. I don’t make friends because I don’t want them to suffer from losing me to suicide. I don’t talk about my dysphoria to my family because they wouldn’t understand and they might interfere in my death. I’ve talked to psychiatrists and a therapist and they don’t want me to end it, but I’m not sure if I care that much about their feelings. If I had realized what I was feeling before my twenties, I might have been saved. Not anymore. I just really wish my suffering wasn’t meaningless. I wish I could help others to avoid my fate.
225. i developed feelings for someone here because they’ve been really super nice to me but i dont want to overstep or like, be weird abt it because i am way too shy and i havent even seen what they look like. they are really really kind tho.
226. 138 here. I would vote Trump a fourth time. I believe that it is necessary for society to collapse so it is built back better.
227. I think I am a genuine sissy. Spent the latter half of puberty jacking off only to myself dressing up as a girl or having ffs. Hrt nuked libido but then prog brought it back nearly as strong. “Borrowed” clothes, shot ropes to the idea of chastity with a hung keyholder, etc. That said I would never admit it publicly because the optics nuke is so strong and the vitriol towards self identified agps is honestly deserved… they are some of the most disgusting repping right wing cucks I’ve ever witnessed. Two time Trumpers. no thanks, and even if I believe this of myself id never do the amount of damage they’ve done to the cause. Fucking idiots. Worse than unclehons. Anyway no one would even believe me if I told them this, because it’s actually so mainstream in culture to reject agp or not know what it even is. Like Patrick Bateman attempting to confess at the end of american psycho and getting laughed off.
228. I genuinely think that “terfs” (radfems) are right but I dont want to stop lying about my sex or go off of hormones.
229. I decided not to hugboxx one woman on here and told her she didn’t pass and I felt like shit for doing it and I’m never doing that again
230. not so long ago I met a group of pre hrt trans girls in my area (they are 1 - 2 years older than me). I taught them a lot of things like makeup, fashion and whatnot, I even got one of them on diy; they looked up to me since I was transitioning for a while at that point. I took pride in my friend group and was genuinely happy for them, but took advantage of them in so many ways. like when we were going out at night or stuff like that I was the “pretty one” in the group, I’d get a fair amount of attention from moids and when one of my friends would tell me she liked one I’d always end up with him; they never confronted me bc of their low self esteem and admiration for me. I think I fed on those. God I was so insufferable I humblebragged so much and not even that just plain bragging and showing off how easy my life is just because I’m pretty. idk if this is good or bad but I used to really hugboxxx and validate them. when they’d feel bad and dysphoric and tell me they wish they could be as pretty as me I’d often tell them that they ARE and just need to have more confindence, even though I didn’t believe it. they got tired of me and stopped talking to me. I sometimes complain about them with my cis girl friends bc in my head they “ridiculously fight over idiotic moids” and “care too much about what other people think”. I’m kinda narcissistic I know, bc that’s not even the only group where those things happened, I was like this even with cis girls lol. I deeply regret all of these things and I’m trying to be better, it’s kinda hard tho
231. Honestly I was pretty indifferent to the puberty. I didn’t feel any distress or anything, suddenly went bad after 22 after exposed to internet tranny culture. R.O.G.D. moment. Rogd infected by yall.
232. The father of my sisters first two children used to constantly have sex with me. He impregnated her when he was 17 and she was 14, and my parents let him move in with us cuz he was the father. He got me hooked on weed at age 11, and one day he laced the weed with something that paralyzed me when it was just the two of us in the house. I went to lie down on the living room couch-bed on my stomach, and I stopped being able to move in a position that hardly allowed me to breathe. Not long after, I could feel my pants get pulled down and… y’know… I was 100% convinced I was gonna die from suffocation with that dick in my ass, basically. This became a pattern, and I was threatened with death not to tell anybody. Eventually I just kinda told myself to learn to enjoy it, and the way I choose to see it was if I were to let him get out frustrations using my body, that was less time he was spending abusing my sister (who’s also pretty evil) or abusing the kids or being a nightmare to my parents. Turns out I was dead wrong, a lot of stuff happened that I didn’t know about… He wouldn’t have forced the kids to have sex with eachother, or have done any of the other fucked up violent things to them, if I just came forward with my situation earlier, if I had ignored his threats of killing me and my whole family and just took his dumbass out myself.

But no, instead I just entered a sexual relationship with him, because I’m a cowardly retard and I should kms. I can’t look those kids in the eyes without feeling profound guilt. I knew he was a monster and I just continued to keep my mouth shut and allowed him to rape me, thinking that his abuse of me would lessen his abuse of others… so retarded, so irredeemably retarded, I need to kms. Even after it came out that he did all that fucked up stuff to them, I said nothing of what he did to me. I should kms. My silence was complicity, it enabled a monster to do the worst of the worst. I don’t care if death was threatened, I knew where he slept, I could’ve ended it all myself. Stupid retard. Kms kms. I need to take responsibility for my part in this. I need to choose a painful method to die.

233. I stayed with my pre-trans GF because I was attracted to her male features. I originally approached her thinking she was a Cis Man.