when i was 13, i had a crush on a girl, she was taller and physically larger then me, because i was tiny at the time, she was pretty and one of the smartest girls in class,

we became friends because i was an insidious fiend, that wanted to spend time with her cause i was sexualilty attracted to her,

in 8th grade we were paired up for a square dance that we were gonna proform for the whole school. because she was the one teaching the class how to do the dance, she would often take the male role in the dance with me, to demonstrate the steps,

i spent 3 years obsessed with her, we became close friends and i became part of her friends group, everyone assuming i was gay but never explicitly saying anything because of regressive norms. they did the same with the other gay kid, who was also part of the group, never directly acknowledged,

she was very touchy feely and would come up to me and we would go for walks sometime holding hands or sit in the same chair at lunch, my retarded hussy attraction style definitely shows here cause i never initiated these and never pushed the boundaries,

in 10th grade i confessed my feelings and she was shocked and turned me down and i lost all my friends, for weeks i felt like i was dieing, then by the grace of god i was given the opportunity to transfer school, and never had meanful feels for a girl again,

after that i started using /soc/ and kik and discords to talk to men who found me desirable and my sexualilty morphed to satisfy the people that were attracted to me in the way i could manage, with me as the subject and i never looked back,

i transitioned to prevent twink death and hoping it would increase my sexual value. when i kick at transbains know it is in fact projection, and I do in fact hate u