considering I had sex pre-hrt a few times for validation I don’t believe I have any right to really pursue transitioning, I don’t how the fuck I could have had anorexia at 12 but then a few years later go on to do that, it’s like I compromised and defiled my soul. It’s nobodies fault but my own frankly, I really did believe I would become normal if I got into a relationship but it only highlighted the dysphoria which is why they’d never last for more than a week usually. frankly I wish I would’ve had someone in my life who made me feel like it was okay to be attracted to men primarily and that it was okay to be trans back then, but instead I had my parents push me in the closet as much as I showed any sign. I’m never socially transitioning.